My husband and I used to walk our dog Skippy (RIP) around our neighborhood every night. Check out Skippy’s picture to the right when he was a puppy 16 years ago.
Every night during our walk the conversation between my husband and I would turn to the same topic. I wanted to do more for the universe. I wanted to impact more lives. I wanted to step out from my 9 – 5 job working for someone else and start my own fitness business. My hubby would tell me to go for it. I would tell him the reasons it was a bad idea. He would then reassure me again that we would be all right.
Every time we had this conversation it went in circles with no resolution. I researched it, talked about it, thought about it, hoped about it, prayed about it, wished about it, and dreamed about it. I did everything imaginable except actually pulling the trigger and doing it.
My husband believed I could do it. But It didn’t matter how much he believed in me. It only mattered that I believed in me. My inaction was about me and my fears. I had to work on my self-image. I had to get over my fear of failing. And I had to recognize that succumbing to my fear was my biggest failure.
One of the questions that I ask new prospective female personal training clients is “How long have you been thinking about reaching your health and fitness goals?”. The answers range from 1 – 20+ years.
Wow – Why do we think for so long before we take action?
What we say:
Women tell me that they have been putting it off because of the fear that they will not stick with it. Or they say that they are afraid they won’t be able to do it physically because they are so out of shape/so old/so tired/so busy/so fat/so…(you fill in the blank) .
The Truth:
Saying “I am afraid I won’t stick with it or I can’t physically do it” is just another way of saying “I am afraid I will fail”. My response is “you ABSOLUTELY won’t be able to stick with it or physically do it if you never get started”.
Do you believe your personal accomplishments are related to your self-image?
In the book Psycho-Cybernetics, Maxwell Maltz writes “The self-image sets the boundaries of individual accomplishment. It defines what you can and cannot do. Expand the self-image and you expand the area of possibility.”
Think of all the time we have wasted just thinking about doing something but not acting on it. All that time focusing on our fears and the “what ifs”. Just like my husband believed in me, I believe in the women sitting across from me that are miserable in their current bodies.
Who are these women?
The women that complain to their husbands every night about their weight, butt, belly, arms, and thighs. Or the women that make negative comments about healthy eating at work and chastise other co-workers for exercising or making better food choices. Or the women that post “funny” fat jokes on Facebook all the while crying themselves to sleep at night because they are so miserable in their bodies.
Believing in these women is the easy part of what I do. The hard part is getting them to expand their self-image so that they can expand their area of possibility and achieve success.
Looking back, all my reasons for not starting a fitness business seem so unreasonable and silly. I wasted time thinking, complaining, questioning, and worrying instead of helping ladies get healthier and happier. Finally, I created enough courage to take the plunge and get started. Then I committed all of my energy to it. And oddly enough MY self-image was boosted as I got into action and out of making excuses. As my self-image grew so did my area of possibility.
What personal goal have you been thinking about for way too long? What do you find yourself wishing for and complaining about the most?
Today is the BEST day to get to work on our self-image and get started taking action on that thing we have feared the most.
Until Next Time 🙂
Great post – it was a huge step for me to enroll in one of your boot camps last year about this time. I “knew” I couldn’t do it and that I was “too old” to fit in with all the young, fit women I’d see. I was SO wrong – I have gotten stronger and more fit and was encouraged to continue my routine even through some bad breaks in my foot – I know I wouldn’t have done that if it hadn’t been for the support of the staff at the PP. I also forward your posts to my daughter who has every reason to believe in herself, but for some reason lacks the confidence…….
Thanks for sharing that!!! And now look at you Karen. Who would have thought that you were ever hesitant to get started? You are a superwoman! Way to take that huge step and get the the new you 🙂 Thanks for always encouraging other ladies.
This is a great post. I recently joined Pink Physic and I looked around at all the fit ladies and I didn’t want to come as much. I felt out of place but seeing this blog post makes me understand I must start with the inside to change the outside! Thanks Alli
How interesting that all you saw when looking around was “fit ladies”. Many of those ladies probably don’t feel as fit as you see them. We are all there to get healthier and happier. We all have more in common than we have differences. The differences are created in our minds/self-images. I am so glad you shared this! So many other ladies feel just like you! Thanks Carla 🙂